this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2025
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HOCUS POCUS, YOU CAN NO LONGER FOCUS!
I CAST… ADHD!
Wait, I already have ADHD. Does that make my ADHD, Super ADHD?
Congrats, you’re now autistic as well.
You're not going to believe this. I already have both. What do I get? Super audhd?
anal sex with a ribbed condom
100s of pleasure dots
Deep rectal itch
I counter with Bigby's Vibrating Finger
🖕
I've spent a minute thinking about this reply and have come to the conclusion that it works both ways.
Sure, you could flip me off for casting this on you.
Or... you're alluding to the use of your middle finger to reach as deep as you can to scratch that deep rectal itch spot.
Or they might want to fuck you to get rid of it.
You got it spot on!
I can think of some ways to get it scratched
Scratch it with a cucumber and then throw the cucumber at you.
Scratch it with a cucumber then take a big bite of said cucumber while maintaining Gowron levels of eye contact.
Not 20 Intimidation Check
Sit on a grave and use Raise Dead.
I cast magic hand.
Mmm, the magic finger 😏
I SUMMON CARBRON THE TRICKSTER GOOD TO SWAP OUR BUTTHOLES
Oh sweet I'm a virgin again
I cast Mage Hand and scratch it then.
Jk, I don't cast Mage Hand.
I, as a mage, just use my hand.
"Mage Hand".
I eat Fig potion
I cast restart PC
Use prune
Finally my calling.
I cast Swamp Ass!
I follow with "fingers are fish hooks"
Not to get political or anything, but is this castable with a radius? Like say if we wanted to AOE a certain godawful parliamentary body.
Rectal can itch?
In DnD, nearly anything is possible. So why not this? ¯\(ツ)/¯