this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2025
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[–] SuiXi3D@fedia.io 38 points 3 months ago (1 children)

HOCUS POCUS, YOU CAN NO LONGER FOCUS!

I CAST… ADHD!

[–] TehBamski@lemmy.world 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Wait, I already have ADHD. Does that make my ADHD, Super ADHD?

[–] SuiXi3D@fedia.io 21 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Congrats, you’re now autistic as well.

[–] applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

You're not going to believe this. I already have both. What do I get? Super audhd?

[–] ScrooLewse@lemmy.myserv.one 1 points 2 months ago

Nope, third time's a bricking.

[–] ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com 29 points 3 months ago (1 children)

anal sex with a ribbed condom

[–] bunkyprewster@startrek.website 3 points 3 months ago

100s of pleasure dots

[–] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 23 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 20 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Deep rectal itch

I counter with Bigby's Vibrating Finger

[–] InnerScientist@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

It's super effective!

@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world has fainted.

[–] dumbass@piefed.social 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] TehBamski@lemmy.world 25 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I've spent a minute thinking about this reply and have come to the conclusion that it works both ways.

Sure, you could flip me off for casting this on you.

Or... you're alluding to the use of your middle finger to reach as deep as you can to scratch that deep rectal itch spot.

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

Or they might want to fuck you to get rid of it.

[–] dumbass@piefed.social 2 points 3 months ago

You got it spot on!

[–] djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 3 months ago

I can think of some ways to get it scratched

[–] Rooskie91@discuss.online 13 points 3 months ago

Sit on a grave and use Raise Dead.

[–] teft@piefed.social 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Mmm, the magic finger 😏

[–] bizarroland@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Scratch it with a cucumber and then throw the cucumber at you.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Scratch it with a cucumber then take a big bite of said cucumber while maintaining Gowron levels of eye contact.

[–] bizarroland@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

Not 20 Intimidation Check

[–] ulterno@programming.dev 7 points 3 months ago

I eat Fig potion

[–] agent_nycto@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I SUMMON CARBRON THE TRICKSTER GOOD TO SWAP OUR BUTTHOLES

[–] bizarroland@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago

Oh sweet I'm a virgin again

[–] pigup@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] TonyTonyChopper@mander.xyz 6 points 3 months ago
[–] DamienGramatacus@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I cast Mage Hand and scratch it then.

Jk, I don't cast Mage Hand.

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 10 points 3 months ago

I, as a mage, just use my hand.

"Mage Hand".

[–] Deconceptualist@leminal.space 4 points 3 months ago

Not to get political or anything, but is this castable with a radius? Like say if we wanted to AOE a certain godawful parliamentary body.

[–] webp@mander.xyz 3 points 3 months ago

I cast restart PC

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 months ago

Finally my calling.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] TehBamski@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

In DnD, nearly anything is possible. So why not this? ¯\(ツ)

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 2 points 3 months ago

I follow with "fingers are fish hooks"

[–] FenrirIII@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

I cast Swamp Ass!

[–] tuskyo@ttrpg.network 1 points 3 months ago

Scratch n' sniff