Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs
My friends, there exists premade maps of labyrinthian proportions that twist and turn, with multiple larger and smaller rooms, shortcuts and hidden passages, and yet still in a format that encourages a natural flow through the area.
It's called IKEA and you can use their floor layouts to trap your players in an inescapable hell.
"as you turn the corner you hear in a deep voice 'LÅNGARYDBESTÅ MACKAPÄRSTÄLL!'" and in front of you lies three boxes and one simple tool. A voice comes into each of your heads telling your party they must build the items only using this universal tool, It must feel solid and you can not argue."
The DM then sits back and eats pizza as they put his furniture together.
A good idea, but what came to mind: You enter a small well lit cave. The walls have assorted moccasins, chopines, poulaines, and other footware spiked to them. A goblin in a colored shirt runs out and greets you in a croaking voice. "What can I help you with today?"
You continue down the vast hallway. You try not to make eye contact with a pair of kobolds near a tiny hut. Despite trying to ignore them the kobolds still approach you and speak "Hello traveler, do you wish to remove years from your life and return to the appearance of youth?". They motion to the tiny hut with shelves lined with lotions, eye cream, and makeup.
What do you do?
If you hadn't specified "and other footware", I would've found myself in "Eric and The Dread Gazebo" territory.
Goblin says: we can arm wrestle for 10%. But I warn you, I am stronger than I look.
A group of pale, unhealthy humanoids approach. There are armed with Orange Julius and wearing JNCO jeans
Roll for initiative
Using airport maps could give you really nice layouts too.
Reminds me of Magic Maze, a boardgame in which players play a Barbarian, a Dwarf, an Elf and a Magician who lost all of their gear in battle and now resort to robbing a shopping mall so they can go on their next adventure.
Great game. I like that you aren't generally allowed to talk, so everyone ends up with their own conflicting plans.
The TRPG "Troika!" has a module that is basically exactly this called "Get It At Sutlers"
It just generates a dungeon crawl contained entirely within a department store by the name of Sutlers
I also use public school maps, zoos, and amusement parks
Sawgrass Mills. South Florida FTW
Hell on earth, perfect