erin

joined 3 weeks ago
[–] erin@quokk.au 5 points 20 hours ago

im year on estrogen lol, and mom not against it here is more about expression, social role

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 20 hours ago
[–] erin@quokk.au 2 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

im always hated moscow i hate this megapolis

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

bashkortostan and in young city in the north borders with udmurtia(try to find on openstreetmaps)

moscow is stupid putin dick lickers i seen videos from moscow from tatar-bashkort and many moscowians nazi bullying them thinking that they from middle east or armenia georgia but THEY BORN IN RUSSIA IN RUSSIAN ETHIC GROUP

and even video with semi passable women to the whole runet that she trans that is bad in moscow but i think just women with trouble passing

st petersburg i dont like climate anyway i hate megapolises

honestly i think it safe enough here and i ~passing so no problems

want i leave russia? honestly no i dont fucking care in which govrenment i live

[–] erin@quokk.au 4 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

parents are supportive, with hrt, ok with transitioning after social problems such as school, and some other

my mom bought and chosen women jacket for me by herself, and omg its soo light and comfy have enough space in hips and overall look good, she said to try pink hoddie stayed in the fitting room before us

they ok with name change

being independently from them is lose hrt "sponsor" :3

also they avoiding deadname, and gendered words like son, etc but still doesnt gender me as girl and honestly i dont care much because there no triggers like son deadname etc

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 1 day ago

also do women & girls in your area wear hyperfem clotches like dresses, skirts? in my area I VERY RARELY see women wearing dress or skirt especially young

so im also didnt want them

[–] erin@quokk.au 4 points 1 day ago

heh im venting here now because my psychotherapy start only from next week and then every week

30
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by erin@quokk.au to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

what stopping me - idk only p a r e n t s

im tired of boymoding

school - next year i will go to home education so no problem

society - idk im seems pass now especially with long hair and baaaaaangs

i remember prev year i switched to another class to end 9 classes of school because of bullying, new classmates was cute pretty femme(even boys) weird and im come out to some of them AND THEY ACCEPTED me, this was so comfy to go school but mom was against to going school because of that SUPPORTIVE classmates...... but now in mine class are fucking terrible now and im not going to school THEY ARE toxic im not even come out but they calling me "опущенный" (prison slang for gay bottom men), "оно"(some like "they" in english but not multiple "oни"), and strictly use insult variations of dead name eg deadnamesik, usually they thread me like 3rd sort but opposite with ugly toxic masculine boy classmates, some try to press sensitive information from me

what my goal - just expression, wear that i want, look that i want, name change(but cant change gender marker)

it will be easy - i have no friends etc, most ppl dont know me, the shit from school definitly go away from this city because it small(140k population) and there no education options

i even can change name right now but im minor and need parent approval of BOTH parents (i didnt live with dad and he doesnt know anything) so problematic and plus school will see change

my parents accept transition & name change after 18 BUT NOT NOW, and even sometimes i wear neutral clothes from women section and THEY SO MUCH BETTER and clotches from men section I CANT WEAR THEM my hips are too big, i tried jacket from men section oh fuck it so tight in hip bone BONEEEE and too loose in shoulders IM SUCCESSFULLY MALEFAILING

so i think i should slowly transitioning

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 2 days ago

also i have similar feet of dad sister her is 39-40 EU, my shoe size 40-41 EU mine larger due flat feet but not androgen expouse, my dad is ~43 also on hrt feet became feminine and smaller old shoes sits too freeit was 41 EU ALSO it changed the angle in x ray now it more "healthy" my mom shoe size is 36 EU (is too small for 160 cm.... often she hard to find right shoe because is more child) interesting but all my female relatives ~160 cm height dad is 177 cm

dad sister really have unhealthy weight we are similar height and im also same pre hrt, pre psych pills now im ok face shape is something similar to dad side female relatives

my mom didnt have body hair at all until hormonal disbalance high DHT, 2 nmol T and im doesnt have at all even after super high T and DHT

interesying but after hrt i rarely feel cold, usually more warm on high testosterone i feel more cold, in childhood also feel more warm

also my mom complexed in teen ages about breast size

 

my mom have very smol breast, dad sister also same even after lactation soooo im have same? definitly i have same and im ok with it

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

oh, i want glasses because stylish and doc A LONG TIME AGO said i should wear special glasses for astigmatism what she found(idk i have GOOD vision so weak astigmatism but worried what if it become worse)

interesting how the lens for astigmatism look

[–] erin@quokk.au 2 points 3 days ago (3 children)

what lens on the glasses that make face more smaller?(on the sides)

[–] erin@quokk.au 3 points 3 days ago

omg so cool! i need also make my timeline

[–] erin@quokk.au 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Способ применения и дозы 1 аппликация (2,5 г геля), содержащая 0,025 г прогестерона, наносится на кожу молочных желез аппликатором-дозатором до полного всасывания 1-2 раза ежедневно, sorry for russian im lazy to find manufacturer instruction in english it saids to put to breasts

so progestogel can be used only for breasts growth?

 

im interesting in additionally suppressing HPG axis without super high E(can cause mood swings)

what other benefits of prog?

im worried about converting into DHT in liver via oral route(i dont like rectal method.....)

 

i live in russia now

honestly i hate all govrenments, idea of bordering humans etc
nowhere i will be good all life, nowhere is good
everywhere fucking capitalists and shitty politics

and what if i move spending 5464653364 euros to good country and i dont will even have right for vote and right wing idiots win by shitty losungs in 15s videos from tiktok etc etc
the example is US

i dont care in which fucking country i live everywhere is bad ppl and good ppl and there no wrong nations

 

i looked up photo was pre hrt
holy im cute girl now vs depressed boy with long hair
estradiol really helps mental health more stronger than lot of psych meds but yes slowly but even after a month i feel much better
no fucking erections no fucking muscle grow in no fucking strong jaw muscles no no no no, fuck te$t0$ter0ne i hope i get more changes after second year of hrt

 

at right side they more slim and solid (more feminine?) at left they squishy and less controllable

that happened to anyone before?

32
do i pass? (quokk.au)
submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by erin@quokk.au to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
 

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sometimes dysphoric about face idk but sometimes not
8 days and im roungly a year on HRT

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