Transfem

While not perfect, the concept wardrobe has a lot of helpful information to get you started for what types of clothes you can try. I linked to the inverted triangle body type, but the bottom of the page has links to other shapes as well!

I feel like I have no idea what kinda stuff to wear. Do any of you have any suggestions?

I don't think there is any right answer to this - you might just have to try things and learn what you like?

I guess I "cross-dressed" my whole life - when I was a kid and a teenager I was trying on skirts and wearing hand-me-down clothes from my mom, etc. I learned from those experiences that I have mixed feelings, that I loved the way women's jeans felt on me and they weren't so femme-coded that it made me feel awful when I looked in the mirror. When I wore skirts and dresses, I felt great or even just more normal, but I hated the way I looked in them. So I developed a habit of either actively trying to suppress wearing those, but eventually I just started wearing basic skirts and dresses around the house in private.

So by the time my egg-cracked, I had some experience wearing women's clothes already, and knew I loved skirts, dresses, etc. - but I still looked awful in them.

HRT is very important, and after a year on it, I started to fit the dresses much better and looked nice in some things. Without HRT I'm not sure I would ever enjoy wearing women's clothes much, it would leave me feeling worse in many ways, at women's clothes don't fit well and leave me feeling monstrous and ugly, etc.

So I guess my suggestion is to be wary of how experimentation might backfire and lead to repression that ultimately makes things worse for you (esp. in the context of what sounds like having a straight spouse who isn't going to be able to be attracted to you as a woman, a situation many late-transitioners find themselves in, and which leads to delaying necessary transition steps by years or decades, usually to the permanent detriment of the trans spouse).

And in terms of clothes, just wear what feels good to wear - I wouldn't suggest you push yourself out of your comfort zone. I don't know how you feel or respond to different clothes, or what you have or haven't experimented with. Start with baby steps, see if you can buy some women's jeans and try them on, see how they feel. The next step might be to try out leggings, maybe.

Ultimately I needed a female body more than I ever needed female clothes, but we all have different (if not also often similar) experiences.

i assume you'd like to have a 'toned down' start? you are nervous about skirts, because thats to explicitly femme? i at least felt that way for years.

in that case i'd suggest you find yourself a cute cardigan, you can wear ir over your regular clothes and it's not to much of a 'committement'. at worst it will be seen as playfull or rather just someone wanting to be comfy.

you could then go buy a womens shirt and some pants you like. wirh these items it is the details (cut, fabric etc.) that differentiate tgem from the mens section. so that's still not too big of a step, but i think you'll see qnd feel it. :)

Thrift stores are great for this. Maybe go shopping with wifey? When you're looking through the clothes take some risks with what you try on! You don't have to buy anything but this way you can start trying to figure out your size according to women's fashion. I've had more time to figure this out and I still have a hard time finding clothes I really like or feel good. Remember also that gender identity is fluid and you don't need to look 'girly' to be a woman. Find your comfort level that suits you now and you can always experiment later when something speaks to you.

PS. Shopping can be EXHAUSTING if you're out of your element and sometimes stores will have zero options. Keep this in mind and try either another store or another day. All the best!!

I was shocked to find out my 5'4" wife and my 6'4" ass are often in the same size range for women's clothes. As soon as we did find that out, she started throwing stuff she didn't want anymore at me to try and see if I wanted it. It also helped me narrow down what i was comfortable with wearing. Going out in it was a whole different molehill, but I settled on leggings and a v neck or tank as my go to real quick. Your wife's unwanted clothes might be a place to start if you happen to wear a similar size and she has any and she's comfortable with it.