this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2025
786 points (99.7% liked)
LGBTQ+
4247 readers
137 users here now
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
For most of my life I was a gender abolitionist. I just didn't care, really, about my masculinity. I'd still be down for GA except I recognize that trans folk get so much out of being their true gender. It makes them really happy, so there's obviously something there.
I'd identify purely as enby (undefined) except I've become repulsed at how maleness is represented in society. With examples of masculinity like Donald J. Trump, Matt Walsh, Ben Shapiro and Joe Rogan, I've given up on maleness, and have proverbially burned my man card.
(Oh, I recently learned my levels of T are atypically low and probably have been all my life. I am seeing an endocrinologist in December to see if I'm a candidate for hormone replacement. I'll try it so long as I don't become a sex pest or a Republican or violent. I may be sad if I lose my hair.)
So now I'm Enby (undefined, but absolutely not a man).
That's an example of genderqueer.
ETA I've deliberated at length at what masculinity looks like, and expressed my sentiments here -- sorry about the messy link.
If it helps comfort you, I'm an enby, phenotypically male, bald as a cue ball, and my natural testosterone is so high I'm practically a teen despite actually being three times older. I am and always have been left AF and a fierce supporter of human rights, including bodily autonomy. I had an incident earlier in life which led to my testosterone temporarily dipping by about half for a few months and nothing about my behavior or beliefs significantly changed. I did nap more but that might have been coincidental. That's about it.
I think most people like the guys you mentioned are just assholes regardless of their testosterone levels.
I hope I'll just be the same, only happier and with sexual interests (or lack thereof) that match my circumstances. As I mention elsewhere, I really don't want to turn into my dad, who is a full MAGA disciple and football fanatic who loves Trump with all his heart.
Considering the men on my mother's side of the family tree all usually lose their hair in their thirties, I may also lose mine, and I'm not thrilled with the idea.
My father also was a MAGAt, up until his death. I'm pretty sure it's not genetic, thankfully.
If you do start to thin, there are a ton of treatments to prevent and reverse it. As long as you get on them early, you'll likely not notice much of a difference. I was just super poor when I started balding, so I didn't have a choice. Now those poor follicles are toast.